A Hard Day's Night
by Ryoga
Summary: Hmm very nice fic! A bit of Wufei bashing here and there. I demand you read this! - ChibiChibi


Author: Ryoga_Hibiki3   
E-mail: [ryoga_hibiki3@hotmail.com][1]

This fanfic takes place at the Winner mansion of which I've never seen the interior, therefore it's going to look the way I want it to. Since I wrote this I bent the characters towards my evil will and they will act the way I want them to. As for the legal stuff, all the character's and just about everything else in this story are the property of it's respectful owner, whoever the hell that is. Don't bother suing for I am broke, and will promptly kick your ass afterwards :) On with my story.   


A Hard Day's Night 

A young man walked down the stairs of some nameless quiet apartment complex where mostly nothing ever happened. He strolled out into the parking lot towards a motorcycle with blue metal that gleamed as the rays of sunlight shone upon it. He got on the bike as he put on a black leather jacket. He had light brown hair covering part of his face. He turned on the gas and started speeding down the freeway. This was Trowa Barton on his way towards the Winner Mansion, famous for being.....famous... Sirens sounded. He turned his glance to the side mirror. There was a cop trailing him. He sighed as he slowed down towards the side of the road after he was off the freeway. He sat patiently as the cop walked toward him. Trowa looked up at the officer as he put up his shades and looked back at him. 

Officer: Excuse me "son". Your eyes look pretty red, have you been smoking pot?   
Trowa: No officer. Your eyes look pretty glazed, have you been eating doughnuts? 

The officer growled a bit as he took out a miniature notepad and a pen. 

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?   
Trowa: Because everyone else was going faster than me?   
Officer: Now you listen here boy. I am an officer of the law, and you were going 20 miles above the speed limit. Your getting a citation, but if you keep that smart mouth of yours up, I have the authority to take you in. Can I see your license, son? 

Trowa took out his wallet and takes out his license and hands it to the officer. 

Officer: .....Now wait a minute! I don't want your license for piloting some frickin' mechanical monster! I need to see your driver's license!   
Trowa: Oh.. 

He takes his Gundam license back and takes out his driver's license and grins as he hands it to the cop. 

Officer: Okay...Mr. Duo Maxwell. This license expired two weeks ago.   
Trowa: I was going to the Department of Motor Vehicles to get a new license.   
Officer: The DMV is the other way...   
Trowa: ....oh....uhm...I had to run some errands before I did that.   
Officer: Well, here's your ticket, and don't let me catch you again. 

With that, the officer got in his car a drove off. Trowa started his motorcycle as he thought "I'm glad I made that fake license with Duo's name on it." 

At the Winner Mansion the real Duo Maxwell is pacing back and forth in the driveway awaiting Trowa's arrival. 

Duo: Damnit! Why do I have to wait out here!? 

The door opens and Heero pops his head out. 

Heero: Because your name was drawn.   
Duo: I bet you rigged it!   
Heero: Shaddap and keep watch.   
Duo: Bah... 

Heero closes the door as he walks back into the kitchen. 

Wufei: So how is he?   
Heero: He suspects fowl play.   
Quatre: I think it was kinda mean we all wrote Duo's name so that way he would have to watch and we can eat a quiet breakfast.   
Wufei: It's not mean. It's JUSTICE! I haven't had a quiet meal for three weeks! If I hear him burp the alphabet one more time.......IT'S JUSTICE I SAY!!!   
Quatre: I just can't argue with that... 

Heero pours himself a bowl of Cocoa Puffs and starts eating it. Wufei reaches for the box of Cocoa puffs. 

Heero: Put the box down....   
Wufei: You can't hog all the puffs Yuy! 

Wufei starts to open the top. Heero whips out a gun. 

Heero: Omae o korosu...   
Wufei: Damn you Yuy!! INJUSTICE!!! 

Heero cocks the gun. 

Wufei: Did I say injustice? I meant....ah....justice, yes. Justice for Heero...   
Everyone else: .... 

Back outside Duo is just about to walk inside as Trowa cruises up slowly. 

Duo: What in the nine hells took you so long!?   
Trowa: I got pulled over by a patrolman.   
Duo: Ah... What'd you tell him?   
Trowa: Bad cop! No doughnut!   
Duo: haha!! You learn fast young grasshoppa!   
Trowa: Faster than you think...   
Duo: Did you say something?   
Trowa: I said thanks for waiting.   
Duo: Feh, it was nothing. 

Trowa gets off his bike and walks into the house with Duo. They walk into the living room where Relena and Heero were relaxing. 

Relena: Good morning Trowa! How was your trip?   
Trowa: A bit bumpy. But otherwise, okay.   
Heero: So, how long are you going to be here?   
Trowa: Just for the night.   
Duo: So, how much are you going to sell that jacket for?   
Trowa: Your soul...   
Duo: No fair! I take souls! Me, Shinigami!!! I am the god of death!!!! All fear me!!! *starts laughing insanely* 

Everyone else sweatdrops... 

Heero: I'm going to my room, if you need anything, ask Quatre, it's his house, not mine. 

Heero walked past the entry way just as Wufei was coming inside with a marker in his hand and a box in the other. 

Wufei: Ha! Look at this Yuy!!! *he thrusts a box of Cocoa Puffs with "Wufei" written in permanent marker on the front in Heero's face* 

Heero blinks. Yuy reaches into the pocket of his denim shorts (no spandex damnit!) and takes out a small white bottle with the label ripped off and grabs Wufei's marker and writes something on it. 

Heero: There..   
Wufei: *looks at the box as it has his name whited out and "Heero" written in it's place*...... 

Wufei grabs Heero's white out and the marker and fiddles with the box. 

Wufei: Haha!!! *holds up the box to Heero's face. It reads "INJUSTICE!" 

Heero grabs the whiteout from Wufei and the marker and starts scribbling on the box. 

Heero: ....*hands it to Wufei who looks at it and it says "Omae o korosu" 

Wufei looks up to see Heero pointing his gun at Wufei. 

Wufei: .....NO! I WILL HAVE JUSTICE! *starts chewing on the box madly*   
Heero: ......You're eating the whiteout....   
Wufei: I do *chew munch* not *nibble* CARE!!! JUSTICE!!!! You will never have these puffs!!   
Everyone else: ..... 

Heero goes to his room and Trowa and Duo talk to Relena. 

Duo: So, what's the plan Ma'am?   
Relena: Well, for tonight's plans, we are going to have a 12 hour horror movie marathon, we're going to order some pizza, soda, and make banana splits.   
Trowa: Wow.....   
Duo: That's sick!!! When do we start!?   
Relena: At about 8 pm, so we have 9 hours to prepare and rest up.   
Trowa: Alright. I'll go unpack my sleeping bag and other stuff from my bike.   
Duo: Hey, lemme help! I didn't wait for you to arrive just so I could stand and drool.   
Relena: I'll go and rent the movies, and get snacks. 

Everyone heads out their separate ways as Wufei is still chewing on the cardboard box insanely yelling "Justice" every now and then. Quatre comes down along with Heero and they both look at Wufei. 

Heero: Will someone remove that...   
Quatre: Clean up duty will handle it. 

Quatre calls a butler in the living room. The butler picks up Wufei the way he was sitting and carries him outside. After that, Heero and Quatre walked into the recreational room whereas they promptly sat at a card table. Heero took out a deck of cards as did Quatre. 

Heero: My red burn deck will smolder you into a cindering pile. Then I'll have the earth swallow it whole!   
Quatre: You're no match for my white/green lifegainer deck. I'll resurrect you, just so I can beat you down again! 

As they were about to start playing a game of Magic: The Gathering, Duo walked in. 

Duo: Trowa didn't bring that much stuff. Oh jeez, you guys are gonna play that again? Come on, I need your help to set up the living room so that way we can all hang out comfortably. Heero and Quatre looked at each other. 

Heero: I will destroy you later...   
Quatre: We'll see....   
Duo: .... 

The trio walked into the living room where they started moving the furniture so that way they would have room to watch the movies. 

Trowa was setting up his sleeping bag when he realized he forgot his jammie's and change of clothes. 

Trowa: Darnit...   
Duo: What?   
Trowa: I forgot my change of clothes.   
Duo: If you want me to, I can go get em for ya, since you just got here, you're probably tired.   
Trowa: That'd be cool of you.   
Duo: But it will cost you your jacket. *grin*   
Trowa: Uhh...no thanks..   
Heero: Don't worry about it Trowa, I'll go for you.   
Trowa: Any fees involved?   
Heero: Just a thank you.   
Trowa: A little steep, but I'll pay up.   
Heero: Heh, I'll be back soon.   
Quatre: Alright, here, take one of my cars. *hands Heero a key*   
Trowa: Oh, speaking of which, here's my key for my apartment. *hands Heero a key with a chibi heavarms attached to it*   
Heero: Alright, which apt?   
Trowa: Number 603. Second floor.   
Heero: Okay. What color car Quatre?   
Quatre: The black Lexus. 

Heero and Trowa blinks... 

Heero: heheheh, I'll be back soon guys. *walks out of the mansion towards the huge garage*   
Duo: Hey Quatre. Know what I want for Christmas?   
Quatre: Go take a shower Duo, you reek.   
Duo: phettp...*walks up the stairs 

Trowa and Quatre walk into the recreational room and sit down at the card table. 

Trowa: My white/blue permission deck will smite you.   
Quatre: My white/green will trample all over your ass.   


Heero continues walking towards the garage passing Wufei who just finished eating the box of Cocoa puffs. Heero opens the door to the Lexus and puts on his shades and starts up the car. Wufei stands up, Cocoa crumbs and cardboard pieces on his face. 

Wufei: Haha!!! JUSTICE YUY! I HAVE JUSTICE!!! 

Heero drives over Wufei and heads out onto the open road towards Trowa's apartment complex. 

Wufei: ....i..n...j.....u.......s...t...............i.........c....e...... 

Relena's pink limo slows down as she rolls down her window. Relena looks out her window to the car next to her. The window rolls down of the other car and the driver looks at her and pulls down his shades. 

Heero: Pardon me. Do you have any Grey Poupon?   
Relena: *smiles* But of course.   
Heero: Well I don't want any. Where ya headed?   
Relena: I'm going to the video store. What about yourself?   
Heero: Trowa left some of his stuff at the apartment, so I'm helpin him out.   
Relena: Well, that's nice of you.   
Heero: Omae o korosu.   
Relena: I love you too. Bai sweetie.   
Heero: Yeahyeah... 

Heero turns left as Relena continues down the road. 

Heero: Heheh....mmm....Lexus....   


Back at the mansion, Duo is sitting on the freshly mowed lawn. He looks around and sighs. 

Duo: Man, I couldn't ask for a better day.... but I'm gonna go inside and play some foosball. 

Duo walks towards the mansion where he unintentionally steps on a flattened Chang Wufei. 

Duo: Hey there Wu-Man! Come on, let's go play a game!   
Wufei: ......yuy........pain......   
Duo: Alright, I'll help ya up.   
Wufei: no.....y..ou.....are...weak.....   
Duo: Obviously. *peels Wufei off the ground and carries the paper boy towards the game room*   


Heero slowly pulls into a parking space at the apartment complex and gets out of the car. 

Heero: 603, huh? *looks around* There it is. 

Heero walks towards the apartment and opens it up with the key. He looks around and walks inside. 

Heero: There they are. *grabs the clothes and turns to head out the doorway* okay, gotta head back now. 

Heero looks at his arms to see a fly sitting there rubbing it's arms together evilly. 

Heero: Get off of me you insidious bug. 

The fly sits there barely moving. Heero blows at it, but it stays still. He tosses the clothes on the couch which makes the fly move and land on the wall. 

Heero: Omae o korosu...*takes out his gun and aims at the wall and shoots at the fly* 

The fly moves away as the bullet leaves a hole in the wall and lands on the counter. Heero aims his gun at the fly again.....   


Duo turns his wrist as the sound of a "Clunk" sounds. 

Wufei: INJUSTICE!   
Duo: Aw, you wuss, it's only the second game.   
Wufei: I will show you how to play this game Maxwell!!   
Duo: Sure you will Wu-Man.   
Wufei: Do not call me that, it's Wufei, WUFEI!!!   
Duo: Rack'em Wu-Man.   
Wufei: ...   


Trowa and Quatre sit down on the couch while flipping through channels. 

Trowa: Anything you want to watch?   
Quatre: Powerpuff Girls!   
Trowa: Not Johnny Bravo?   
Quatre: Nah, it's probably a rerun.   
Trowa: How about Digimon?   
Quatre: No way, the new digi destined guys suck.   
Trowa: How about DragonBallZ?   
Quatre: And see a 5 minute fight that lasts three weeks?   
Trowa: How about Tenchi?   
Quatre: That comes on after the Powerpuff girls, doesn't it?   
Trowa: No, it comes on after Sailor Moon.   
Quatre: Then let's watch Sailor Moon. Moon Prism Power!!!   
Trowa: ......*thwap*   
Quatre: oww...   


Heero aims the gun again at the fly...   


Relena sighs in her limo as she looks at the movies and the snacks. 

Relena: I hope they moved around the furniture.   
Driver: If you're worried Miss Relena, why not call them?   
Relena: Oh no, if I do, I'll jinx myself. I have to believe that they had forethought.   
Driver: Your a nice person Miss Relena.   
Relena: Thank you. 

"Clunk" 

Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!!   
Duo: Ah, shaddap.   


Quatre walks back into the living room after using the facilities, the wonderful facilities of Oz !(sorry, couldn't help it -.-;) 

Trowa: You're just in time, Tenchi's on!   
Quatre: Woo-Hoo!! Jurai Moon Power!!!   
Trowa: ......*thwap*   
Quatre: Ow...   


The fly lands on the floor. and Heero aims at it. 

Heero: Omae o korosu evil fly. *fires the gun* 

Someone yells from downstairs 

Someguy: Hey! Whatch where you shoot that thing!!   
Heero: Sorry......   


Wufei and Duo walk into the living room. Duo sits on the love seat, and Wufei sits on the floor cross-legged. 

Quatre: Hey, you guys missed Sailor Moon and Tenchi.   
Wufei: I do not want to see weak girls failingly attempt to fight.   
Duo: What was Lita wearing?   
Trowa: Anyway guys, we're gonna start the movie thon soon, so let's set up the places where we're gonna sleep.   
Everyone else: Alright. 

Wufei, Duo, and Quatre start setting up their places. Trowa heads towards the phone and starts calling places for pizza.   


Relena walks inside the house as they are setting up there spots and looks around. Relena smiles as she walks towards the kitchen. 

Relena: Hi Trowa, are you ordering?   
Trowa: Yep. Hello? Yeah, I'd like 5 large pizzas...   


The fly lands on the door rubbing it's arms together evilly. Heero aims his last bullet at the fly. 

Heero: You will not evade me this time...   
Fly: Bzzz.....   
Heero: Don't plead for mercy now!!! Your death is at hand!!! *fires the gun for the last time* 

Heero walks over to to where the fly was and looks around. He picks up an empty bullet with the flies body on it. 

Heero: Now you will know better than to mess with Heero Yuy, "The Perfect Soldier" 

Heero grabs Trowa's clothes, which were somehow unscathed and clatters down the stairs. He closes the door behind him and locks it. Heero heads towards the Lexus with it's key in hand and gets in.   


Trowa hangs up the phone and looks at Relena. 

Trowa: It'll be 85.67.   
Relena: Alright. Did you order bread sticks and the other things?   
Trowa: But of course.   
Relena: Sometimes Trowa, I think you're the only one responsible around here. 

Wufei's voice comes from the living room. 

Wufei: Weak girl!!!   
Relena: And there's my proof... 

Relena yells back to the living room. 

Relena: Who do you think is paying for your food, you free-loading, sword wielding idiotic male sexist!?   
Wufei: I meant weak woman.   
Relena: Excuse me!?   
Wufei: injustice... Did I say "weak woman"? I meant Great Lady! Strong, capable responsible smart... 

Relena sits on the couch and relaxes a bit. Trowa sits on his sleeping bag and leans on his side. 

Trowa: All we have to do is wait for Heero   


The Lexus slowly stops at the front steps. After Heero stops the car, he gets out and walks inside. 

Trowa: Speak of the devil.   
Duo: Present!   
Wufei: Shut up Maxwell   
Duo: My name is DUO!   
Wufei: Maxwell   
Duo: Wu-Man   
Wufei: Maxwell!   
Duo: Wu-Man!   
Wufei: MAXWELL!   
Duo: WU-MAN!   
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!   
Duo: JUSTICE!!!!   
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!   
Duo: JUSTICE!!!!!!!!!   
Everyone Else: SHUT UP!!!   
Duo and Wufei (in monotone voices): We're sorry...   


Heero tosses the clothes to Trowa and then walks over to his spot, which is rather close to Relena. Just then, the doorbell rings. 

Quatre: I'll get it. *walks over to the door way and opens it* Pizza's here!! 

Quatre hands the money to the pizza guy as Wufei and Trowa carry in the hot pies and sets them down on the floor where everyone else crowds around to get their slice. Duo gets out the first tape and sets it in the vcr. 

Duo: Ladies, Gentlemen, and Sexists.   
Wufei: INJUSTICE!   
Everyone: Shut up!   
Duo: I now present to you, the horrorthon!! *cheers erupt* 

Duo bows. 

Duo: Now, if I have your attention. We shall start with the legendary "Rocky Horror Picture Show". *more cheers* 

The night continues on with screams, creaking doors, evil laughing. All the while, Trowa watches with interest, Wufei watches laughing as the girls get kidnapped and whatnot in which he is promptly thwapped by Relena, Quatre hides under his sleeping bag when the zombies and killing stuff happens, Heero watches boredly, Relena clings to Heero being scared throughout most the time, and Duo chomps on pizza's and chugs soda while burping and randomly pointing out parts of movies he's already seen.   


In the morning, the collective bodies awake at the same time for the most part with a 2-10 minute difference. Trowa yawns as he stands up and stretches and starts packing up his stuff. Duo wakes up and starts pouring himself a bowl of Lucky Charms. Wufei starts pouring a bowl of Cocoa Puffs. Heero gets up instantly like raising from the dead holding a gun out aiming at Wufei. 

Heero: You are being kind and pouring a bowl for me, aren't you?   
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!! 

Heero cocks the gun 

Wufei: Of course I was.   
Heero: That's what I thought. 

Wufei pours himself a bowl of Frosted Flakes. Relena wakes up and starts pouring herself a bowl of Frosted Flakes. 

Wufei: You are a weak girl, you do not deserve the GREAT Frosted Flakes!!!   
Heero: Omae o korosu *Holds the gun a foot away from Wufei*   
Wufei Tell me when Miss Relena. 

Quatre starts making himself eggs and bacon. Trowa walks into the kitchen, dressed in jeans a white shirt and leather jacket. 

Quatre: Oh, hey Trowa, you gonna have some breakfast?   
Trowa: No, but thank you Quatre, I gotta head home, have some errands I want to run. Came to say goodbye. If you guys need me for something, just call me, ok?   
Relena: Thanks for coming Trowa!   
Wufei: Have a good day Barton.   
Quatre: We'll see you soon Trowa.   
Duo: Take care dude. Do you know what I want for Christmas?   
Heero: ....uhm.....Have a safe trip home Trowa.   
Trowa: Thanks guys. I'll be seein ya! 

Trowa steps outside of the mansion and gets on his bike and roars the engine and heads out onto the open road. Meanwhile, Heero goes into the shower with a change of clothes. He sets them down and notices a fly on the counter..... 

Quatre goes into the living room to see what morning cartoons were on. Relena goes about her business and starts preparing for a meeting she had scheduled for today. 

Wufei sits at the kitchen table looking around warily. Wufei cautiously walks over to the cupboard. He looks to his left... then to his right.... Wufei opens the cupboard and takes out a box of Cocoa Puffs™ 

Wufei: Yesss....justice.....*opens the box* What in the nine hells!?!?! 

Wufei looks in the empty box. He blinks as he takes out a white piece of paper and unfolds it. "Omae o korosu Wufei" 

Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!!!   


Duo yawns as he walks back to his sleeping bag to take a short nap. Before he sits down, there is a knock at the door. He sighs as he walks over and opens it. A Federal Express man looks at Duo. 

F.E.: I'm looking for Duo Maxwell?   
Duo: Speaking.   
F.E.: Here you are sir. *hands him a letter*   
Duo: Thanks 

Duo slams the door in the man's face as he stumbles over to his sleeping bag and opens the letter. 

Quatre: What is it Duo?   
Duo: AGH!?!   
Quatre: What is it?   
Duo: It's a court summon!   
Quatre: What law did you break now?   
Duo: It says speeding! *he blinks* there's a note..   
Quatre: What's it say?   
Duo: Let me read it first! *opens the little note*   
Note: This is what you get for being a smart ass! signed Officer Ben Winger, Highway Patrolman   
Duo: What the F***!?   


Trowa slows his bike down as he pulls into a parking space. He gets off his bike and walks up the stairs to his apartment and opens the door with his key. Trowa walks in holding his duffel bag. He drops his bag and his mouth as he looks around at his holey room. 

Trowa: Omae o korosu, Heero....   


The end. 

Questions, comments? E-mail me at [ryoga_hibiki3@hotmail.com][1]   


   [1]: mailto:ryoga_hibiki3@hotmail.com



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